Healthy Living by Willow Creek Springs
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Healthy Living by Willow Creek Springs
From Triggers To Triumph: A Practical Guide To Change with Joe Grumbine
Change doesn’t start with willpower; it starts with honesty. Joe opens up about the habits that held him back, from tobacco cravings to the quiet compromises that sneak in during hard seasons, and lays out a practical path to break negative cycles without losing your sanity. If you’ve ever wondered why you keep doing what you swore you wouldn’t, this conversation gives you the map—and the courage—to try again, smarter.
We walk through the habit loop—cue, routine, reward—and show how to swap routines while keeping the reward your brain wants. You’ll learn how to spot triggers in the wild, from post‑meal cravings to certain places, times, and moods. Joe shares how journaling reveals patterns you can’t see in the moment, and why measurable goals like “no habit within 60 minutes of meals” beat vague promises every time. We dig into accountability and community support, simple reminders that meet you at risky times, and how to celebrate small wins that fuel big change.
Environment design becomes your secret weapon: remove temptations, add friction to relapse, and stage your space for success with visible cues for better choices. We also unpack mindfulness tactics to ride out cravings—breathing, pausing, and asking what you want most, not first. When setbacks happen, you’ll have a plan to analyze the cue, adjust the routine, and move forward without quitting. It’s not about perfection; it’s about persistence, one clear step at a time.
If you’re ready to own your choices, replace unhelpful routines, and build habits that support your health, this episode offers tools you can use today. Subscribe, share with a friend who needs encouragement, and leave a review with one small goal you’re setting this week—we’ll cheer you on.
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Well, hello, and welcome back to the Healthy Living Podcast. I'm your host, Joe Grumbine, and it's been a while since I've been able to do uh a solo episode. We've had so many great guests coming on. Um really haven't even had a space to do it, but with the holidays coming up, we got a little bit of a break. And uh, as much as we love scheduling our guests, and of course, if you're interested in being a guest, reach out. Um, we do uh we're we're scheduled out, I don't know, almost six months ahead sometimes, but uh there's always a space. Um, but I do like to talk about topics myself, and uh Lord knows uh I'm able to talk for a good long while when when needed. Uh, for those of you who don't know, my name is Joe Grumbine. Um, I'm a host of this podcast. I'm also the CEO and formulator for Willow Creek Springs, where we make natural skincare products and uh um natural herbal remedies. We also, I'm also the CEO and founder of Gardens of Hope 501c3. We've got a two and a half acre botanical garden out in Paris, California, and we offer therapeutic horticulture and education and uh retreats and all sorts of good things. Um, so if you're interested in any of those, please reach out. I'm easily found um grumby and joe at gmail.com or my phone number is 951-436-6312. Um today I want to talk about habits. We've talked a little bit about habits already, and I want to talk about breaking habits. So as it happens, it seems that most of the habits, and certainly not all, but many of the habits I should say that we have are destructive or harmful or negative in some way, or slow us down or hold us back, or worse. Um addictions are habits, uh, bad relationships are habits, um you know, laziness is a habit, uh, bad eating habits. I mean, there are so many habits that we find ourselves in, even triggers can be habits. Um just the way that we are. Look at yourself and look at anything that you don't like about yourself. And I'd be willing to bet that somewhere in that situation is a habit. And so today I want to talk a little bit about how do we break habits. Um, obviously, I'm talking about getting rid of negative things. Um, these are mindful choices that we're making. And I've got a lot of little things that I've gathered that I want to share about ways to help. Um, remember, everybody's unique. This podcast isn't about me telling you how to do a thing. This is a podcast that says, hey, here's something I discovered. Look into it. Maybe try it out for yourself. Um, do more research. I think that knowledge is power. And if you've listened to this podcast before, you realize that we come from a variety of points of view. Uh, don't have, I'm not trying to push an agenda, I'm trying to shed light on truth. And sometimes we find truths here that I didn't expect. Sometimes we roll out things that I'm well aware of and and um espouse greatly, and I just want to share it. In this case, um, I've done some research. I am gonna share some of my own personal experiences, and this is really more of um a process. So one of the things with habits is identifying them. I think that a lot of times we're in denial about a lot of things. We don't want to acknowledge that we have an addiction, we don't want to acknowledge that we have a bad relationship, we don't want to acknowledge that maybe we're we have bad eating habits or bad whatever our habit is that's that we're trying to break. Or we we would like to break if we're being super honest. And I think that maybe that's one of the biggest and most important elements, you know. I think with an addiction, especially, acknowledging that you have a problem, acknowledging that you have a habit that maybe isn't good uh with the relationship, especially as well. Um, we put up with things, and this isn't just a romantic relationship or a spousal relationship, these are business relationships, these are, you know, if you've listened to any of these episodes, I've I've gone on um almost ad nauseum about some of the relationships that I've severed and and getting rid of things. Um many of the things I've gotten rid of were just unplugging from relationships that weren't serving me in any way, that were causing me harm, or maybe I was making excuses for. So I think that one of the challenges that we're going to have is gonna be some moments of brutal honesty. And I think that we need to identify um not only the habits that we have and acknowledge them and recognize them and say, hey, make a decision, make a constant, a conscious decision, maybe make an outward statement, maybe make it, maybe make an assert an assertion or an um oh shoot, um brain fog, sorry folks, still dealing with the chemo, red blood cell diminishment, um uh affirmation, you know, that identifies that hey, I am past this, or I'm working on this, or I'm better than this, or whatever it is, but but own it. You know, a big part of this podcast in finding health is responsibility, owning your shit. You know, you're the only one that got yourself in the mess you're in. Nobody did this to you, and so everything about you that you like and everything about you that you don't like, you did that. And nobody did it to you or for you. And if you let somebody do something to you that you did that, and maybe that's a habit you have of allowing things or not stopping things, but with a habit, you're gonna have generally something that causes you to engage in it, and sometimes it's just not thinking. I know when I was going through uh my tobacco addiction that lasted for 13 years, and when I recognized that, hey man, I need to stop this, it took me years of going at it from different angles and and trying different things, and this is as a you know, 20-something. Um and and I started to look at it and and and get to know it because I was struggling. Every time I would beat it for a little while, something would happen, something would trigger it, and I would go back. And then I realized that there was an excuse for everything. It could be I was happy celebrating something, or maybe it was I was sad about something, or maybe I was upset at something. But whatever it was, if it was outside of the norm of just humdrum daily living, I could use it as an excuse to go back to this habit. So triggers are important to recognize and reckon, own, to say, hey, you know what? Every time I start feeling this way, I tend to do this thing, or I allow this thing, or I don't do this thing, or whatever it is. Um, reflect on when and why you engage in the habit. Identify uh these triggers, you know, is it emotional, is it stress, anxiety, is it environmental? Like uh to for me, still uh one of the places or things when I used to dip tobacco after a meal uh would always be a this very strong craving. Or if I was fishing, and but whether it was by myself or with somebody, but walking down a stream or sitting by a lake or on a boat, just always want crave that dip. And um, you know, certain times of the day, whatever it is, but take a minute and start thinking about these triggers, like when what happens when I do that thing. And another tool that I found, which is good for just about everything involving health. In fact, anybody comes to me for a consultation about anything, I will always assign you a journaling assignment. Um track yourself, own it. We forget so many things, whether it's conveniently or or naturally or whatever the reason we do, we forget a lot and we don't own our shit. And so write it down. You know, if you got a uh a bad eating habit, write down everything you eat. If you can't sleep, write down what are you doing before you sleep? How how long did you sleep? How was your sleep? If you got a an addiction habit, you track how much you did, when you did it, what did you do before you did it, how did you feel? I mean, everything you can. And and then go back and reflect on these things. So I'd say that's that's a really big one. Um understand the habit loop. Generally, a habit involves you know, a cycle of things, not just a single event or activity or or substance or whatever. There's gonna be some kind of a loop that happens, and whether it's you know, you feel lousy, um, you get hungry, you eat the meal, you feel bad about it, you puke it up, or whatever it is your habit is, it doesn't matter. There's gonna be some kind of uh of a of a loop. And here's sort of an example of it of like a cue, which is like the trigger, and then your routine. Um that's the thing that you do, and then the reward. What do you get from it? You know, that was one of the things I really did with my tobacco. I was like, why in the hell do I want this? Like, what is it that I've got from it? And the best thing I could come up with was it just satisfied a need. It didn't make me feel better, it didn't give me clarity, it didn't sometimes it made me want to throw up. But all I could really come up with was it just fed it fed a hunger. And um so th so I think that being honest is critical here. You know, if you're making excuses, hey, you're not gonna get anywhere with this. Go back to square one and maybe make that decision. I think that's maybe the most important thing in this whole episode or or exercise is make a decision. Decide this is what I want, this is what I'm doing, this is what I'm going to do. And so then when you're looking at these, you know, cycle, this loop of Q, routine, reward, replace the routine. You're gonna have that trigger happen because you live your life, you're gonna seek a reward because you got you you have a stimulus and you're gonna want to have a response. So change what you're what you're doing. Just say, well, instead of eating that candy bar, I'm going to, I don't know, do 20 push-ups and then eat a piece of fruit or whatever. And try to find something that can give you a similar or a better um fulfillment. And there's so many ways to get these fulfillments, you know, exercise, um good healthy fruit, um, a good interactions can replace those same chemicals in your brain that the bad ones do. So here's another one set clear goals about what you want to do. So many times, like we just go, oh, I'm gonna get better, I'm gonna just stop this, or or whatever. But sometimes the gap between I'm an addict and I'm not an addict is just huge. So maybe it's start out with, well, I'm not gonna I'm gonna pick the worst habit I have, and I'm gonna say, well, I'm not gonna do it at that time. So for me, after a meal, I've I just said, well, I'm not gonna do it within 60 minutes of a meal, before or after. Okay, well, that's something maybe that's solvable. Maybe that's something I can accomplish without having to make that gigantic leap of quitting cold turkey or whatever it is. Um be clear about your goals and and make sense out of it. Something that's measurable, something that you can say, you know, like you say, well, I'm just gonna do better. And then somebody says, Well, how are you doing with that? Oh, yeah, I'm doing better. Well, how? What is it that you can look at to say, well, I'm doing better because um I'm now walking a half a mile a day instead of not walking at all, or I'm eating, you know, two portions of vegetables every day instead of none, or whatever, something that you can you can quantify. These are things that help us to get that feel-good um chemical, that dopamine that says, hey, I did something. It also gives us a point that we can lock into that says, okay, I'm here now. I was there, I'm here now. And then you don't have to go backwards and you can add to it. Um breaking your goal into pieces is another way, too, that people really can accomplish things. You know, so many times we say we get disgusted with ourselves, or we get upset, and we just go, fuck it, I'm not gonna do this anymore. And you just make this gigantic leap of I want have this big problem, and I'm just not gonna do it anymore. And then little by little life creeps in, those triggers happen, and you hold off with willpower for a period of time, and then at one point you have a break, and then you start all over again. Sometimes breaking it up into pieces is a is a good way. Um, it can it can make a lot of sense. Um, accountability, like I said already, is powerful. Like you have to own your shit. You're the only one that's gonna change this. Nobody can do this for you. You know, some people they get locked up, thrown in jail, and you quit your habit because you can't get the drugs or the whatever the thing, the food or the the bad habit that you had. You can't get where you were, or you go to some kind of a rehab, or you go on a vacation or whatever. You you remove yourself from the thing, the ability to get the thing. Well, that doesn't change the habit, it just means you're not engaging it at a given time. So you gotta own it, establish that accountability. So sometimes um having somebody that you share this with can be important. Uh sometimes just doing it on your own is is enough, but if you got somebody that you're accountable to, that you can share your progress and that they can um they can establish support and and reinforce that and give you little tidbits of guidance or or share their experience. I think that can be very helpful. And then, of course, there's groups, and it can be in person, it can be online, it can be a um, it can be a zoom call, like the cancer group that I'm part of, it's not about habits. Well, it's about positive habits, it's the opposite of what we're talking about here, but still people sharing their experience and saying, Well, I did this and and this is what it did for me. It's immensely, immensely helpful. So I'm not particularly big on AA or anything like that, but that doesn't mean it doesn't work for a lot of people. Um, I think that groups can be very powerful and finding a community. I mean, that's what this podcast is all about. It's about community. So I think that finding people that either share the problem or have shared it or understand it, or at very least support you can be instrumental and certainly helpful in that. Another piece of this is in uh in accountability is little triggers to help you overcome. So reminders, visual cues, uh tracking your progress. Again, the journal is a powerful tool here. Sometimes things like post-it notes or little memos or text yourself or send yourself an email, or you know, you can actually schedule something to be sent at a certain time to say, hey, good job. You didn't do this thing, it's already noon. You know, you can do it. You only got you're already halfway through the day. Whatever it is, those are things that can help you to be accountable and to help you get through. You know, time is really a bitch when you're first changing a habit. I can remember going through quitting tobacco that I mean, it was literally every few minutes I got a craving, and it was in my little brain was, I want it. And I had to say, No, I want it, no, I want it, no, I want it, no, and it just kept happening over and over and over again. And over time, those urges got less often, and then over more time they got less loud, and then eventually they started to go away. And now they're you know, 30 years later, they're occasional once in a great while, but they're still not gone. It's still something I have to deal with. So little triggers, little things to help you, just as much as little things that have caused problems uh can be helpful and track your progress. Use that journal. Own your accomplishments just as much as you own the problem. So here's another tip, and there's value to it because really we live in a real world and you know, alter your environment, remove temptations. Like if you're trying to quit tobacco, why in the hell would you have a can of tobacco sitting right on your desk staring at you? I mean, yeah, if you want to up the ante and and and test your willpower, but chances are if you're an alcoholic and you got a bottle of whiskey sitting on your desk, and whiskey's your drink of choice, eventually you're just gonna have a moment. You're gonna go, oh, screw it. I'm gonna, I'm gonna have a little shot here. And, you know, get rid of it. Make it more difficult to have to go back to that habit, make it to be more of an effort, because the more of an effort it is, the more time it's gonna take, the more time you have to get back to your senses. And, you know, go, what in the hell was I thinking? I don't want that. And sometimes those moments can be critical. There were a few times where I came close to breaking when I finally made my commitment and my my promise to God that I wasn't gonna do it anymore. There were still a few times that I came close. And if it wasn't for that little bit of time that I had before, if I was going to do it, I would have to go and get it. And I'd have all that time to think about it, and I would generally stop myself before it came. Remember, a craving, what I discovered, it's kind of like any emotion. It doesn't last that long if you don't feed it. So an emotion, it's an anger or uh whatever it is, uh a desire, uh a fear, an anxiety, whatever it is, unless you sit there and nurture it and feed it, it generally lasts about 10 to 20 seconds. And it's the same with an urge. When you get a craving for something, or you feel the need to do a thing, it doesn't last for an hour. Generally, it's it's short. It might be powerful, but if you can write it through and say, well, hold on a second, let me think about this and let it pass. And then you go, Yeah, I think I I don't need that. I'm I'm okay. You'll realize when you realize that it it doesn't take very long, and you know that you can write it, it'll give you the wherewithal and maybe even the courage to um hold on that little bit. And it create positive places, like surround yourself with cues for good habits or or good people, or go to a place where it's just not acceptable to do the thing that you were doing. Um there's a lot of ways that you can do those things, you know, set out your exercise clothes so that you wake up and you're like, oh yeah, I'm gonna go running today, or I'm gonna go uh I'm gonna do that thing, or put the book in front of your uh write it right in at your breakfast table because I'm gonna I'm gonna discipline myself to read, or whatever it is, make it easy to do the good thing and more difficult to do the hard, the bad thing. Uh practice mindfulness. This is another really important thing that has to do with accountability. Um, but a lot of times we will allow just not thinking and lack of awareness, lack of mindfulness, and we'll do that thing, not thinking about it. How many times do you find yourself eating a bowl of whatever that thing that you don't want to eat or you shouldn't be eating, and you don't even remember how you got it. You don't remember going to the fridge, you don't remember pouring it, you don't remember all of a sudden you're just doing it, you're eating it, or maybe it's lighting up that cigarette, or maybe you got that drink in your hand, or whatever your thing is. It's you just it they can become such a mindless habit that you just find yourself doing it without thinking. So be mindful, live in that moment, and things like meditation or deep breathing or prayer can be very powerful in keeping your mind present. And if you truly want to quit the habit, then you're gonna be mindful of that at all times. And remember, you're gonna do what you want to do. People that have that do things that they just whatever, they don't own it. The truth is you do what you want to do. So if you get in a fight with your spouse over stupid shit, the truth is that's what you want to do. Nobody's making you do that. Or if you eat the lousy food, well, you went and bought it and you wanted that at one point. Whatever it is, we do what we want to do, and and mindfulness can be very important in reminding us of what is it that I want, and maybe digging deeper and owning the thing that you want. And no, I really want to lose that weight. I really want to, I really want this cancer to be gone, so I'm gonna do the things that I need to do for that to happen. I've struggled with that a little bit lately because I have this low red blood cell count. So I really need to get a little more protein in me, and that goes totally against the diet that I'm on, which means I got to take more enzyme, which costs$1,000 a month, and I don't want to spend that money. And it's really given me a bit of a struggle where I need to do the thing because I'm weak and I've got all these symptoms of anemia and low, low red blood cells in hemoglobin, but it also I see that slippery slope that says, Oh, well, you you had that one burrito, let's have another one tomorrow. You know, I made a decision to have that one burrito, and and I took the enzyme and I did the thing I had to do. Uh, I found myself having a sweet tooth and going, yeah, I'm gonna buy myself a bag of candy bars. And I ate them, and they weren't they were sort of healthy candy bars. They're full of coconut and coconut sugar, but truth is it's sugar, and it's not good, and it's not better, and it's it, it's it was something I let myself do, but I'm not gonna do it again. I'm not gonna keep doing it, you know. It was just a moment of I gotta get through this struggle, and I let myself have a little bit of a of a joy for a minute, but I'm back back on track. And uh mindfulness is a big part of that. Pause before you act. A lot of times we we we just knee-jerk react when somebody comes up to you and irritates you. You gotta go and give them that jab or or pout or ignore them, or whatever the thing that you do. And take a second when you get irritated, because chances are it's Something that you need to experience and learn and get over, you know. That's where growth comes from. And so give yourself a a second before you take an action. You know, there's an old wisdom of, you know, count to 10 before you say that thing when you're gonna want to say a destructive thing. Well, it's true. Give yourself a second to think it over. Is this really what I want to do? Because the truth is you can't undo anything. If you say it, you said it. If you do it, you did it. You can't go back and undo anything. Not not really. You can say you're sorry, you can puke it back up, you can whatever, purge yourself of that thing you did. But the truth is, when you did it, you did it. And so take a minute, pause, take five seconds, ten seconds. The longer you wait, the better the choice you're gonna make. So consider that. Here's another one: reward yourself. This is big. Uh, we function well with rewards. And if you can create some kind of a system that says, well, if I get through to lunch, I'll give myself this thing that I like. That's not bad. That has nothing to do with this habit. I'll let myself, I don't know, whatever, sit and watch uh 20 minutes of TV or or scroll through the internet or whatever. Just take a nap. Whatever the thing that that you want to do, but you don't really let yourself do, but it has nothing to do with your habit. Give yourself an incentive when you're reaching a little milestone and set a milestone, make yourself work for it, and celebrate these little little wins. Sometimes we take so many things for granted, including the little progresses. And I'm guilty of that. I'm like, yeah, whatever. That was a little thing. How much did that matter? Well, own it. That little thing was could have been a little bad thing. Instead, it was a little good thing. So give yourself a give yourself a celebration that says, hey man, you did all right. Good work. A little attaboy goes a long way. That's where a lot of dopamine comes from. That feel-good hormone in your brain. And especially, you know, another reason for having community around you is they can reinforce these little things. When you celebrate a little thing and somebody else celebrates it with you, hey, it feels extra good. Here's one learn from your setbacks. You know, it's it's we're human. Part of the human experience is we're gonna screw up, we're gonna make mistakes, we're gonna fall down. And one thing that I've learned is falling down is where we learn. Don't be afraid to fall. I mean, don't try to fall, but if you do, you know, first thing you do is you get yourself back up on your feet and you go, okay, you're all right. Don't beat yourself up because you fell. Praise yourself because you got back up. Acknowledge, hey, I'm in a spot where I can learn from. Let's let's take advantage of this and learn from it. So when you fall and you do something stupid, well, let's look at that and say, what can I do different? Be ready to pivot, to adjust your strategy, or something's not working, or you need to add something or take something away from it, you know, acknowledge that. Don't be stuck in I'm gonna do this this way, and that's all there is, or forget it. You know, how many times do I hear that? Forget it, it's not working. Well, if it's not working, do it a little different, and maybe it'll work this time. You know, what's your goal? Is your goal to make it work? Is your goal to make an excuse for it not working? All right, I like that one. And maybe the most important thing is stay committed and persistent. I don't know how many times I've talked about the one thing the human experience offers us is the ability to carry on, get through that tough day. Just make it through the day, make it through the hour, make it through the minute. You know, that's the one thing that AA uh I think does have good is one day at a time, right? We're gonna get through one day. I'm not worried about the month, the year, just get through the day, you'll be all right. And tomorrow's a new day, we're gonna try it again. I think that that is critical. It's just commit yourself. Say, I'm gonna just stay with this. And if I get a rough spot, I'm gonna commit to getting through an hour, whatever it is. Just remember, it's gonna take time, and dedication is the key. So you just gotta keep reinforcing that commitment, that dedication, and take time regularly to reflect and look on not only how you're doing, what what struggles you're dealing with, but look back. I don't know how many times I've forgotten about how far I've come in any given situation because I'm busy stuck in the fat in the fight in the trenches, and I'm busy going through that grueling grind when the reality is, wow, look at how far I've come. I used to not be able to do this at all, and now I can do it. Or, you know, this used to be so difficult, now it's it's not so bad. Remember, breaking a habit is gonna require a deep understanding of the behavior. You gotta really get to know yourself. Um, you got to have a commitment to change, and you've got to be willing to create a program or a strategy to manage the process. And if you do these things, you can overcome anything, any bad habit, you can develop better habits, healthy constructive behaviors. And remember, persistence is everything you can carry on, get through it. Every step matters, no matter how small. And we are what we decide to be. So, on that note, I just want to thank everybody for being a part of this, uh, for listening. And um, you know, if you really want to get deep, we've got the subscriber episodes. And I just really want to thank all the listeners for making this show possible. And I'm your host, Joe Grumba, and we will see you next time.
