Healthy Living by Willow Creek Springs
A podcast about practices to promote healthy lives featuring experts, businesses, and clients: we gather to share our stories about success, failure, exploration, and so much more. Our subscription episodes feature some personal and vulnerable, real-life stories that are sensitive to some of the general public.
Healthy Living by Willow Creek Springs
When Healing Efforts Backfire: The Delicate Balance of Cancer Treatment
A health crisis unfolds as my scheduled port placement surgery gets abruptly cancelled. After weeks of waiting for insurance approval and preparing for chemotherapy treatment for my squamous cell carcinoma, I found myself on the operating table, IV inserted and ready to go, when blood tests revealed an elevated white blood cell count. The medical team immediately halted the procedure due to infection concerns.
My journey takes an unexpected turn as I confront the reality that my own healing attempts may have contributed to this setback. In trying to be proactive, I inadvertently aggravated the tumor, causing it to breach and weep. This experience highlights the delicate balance of the healing process and the limitations of our understanding of complex bodily systems. As I note during this vulnerable moment: "Sometimes you set something in motion that's hard to undo. These reactions and these systems are very delicate and we don't understand them nearly as much as we think we do."
Despite this disappointment, I remain steadfast in my approach, continuing with oxygenation therapy, physical exercise (what I call "sand therapy"), and infrared sauna sessions. The challenges are mounting as the tumor increasingly affects my ability to speak and function normally, creating a sense of urgency in my treatment journey. Through it all, I emphasize the vital importance of community support in healing and express profound gratitude for those standing with me. This episode serves as both a personal update and a meditation on faith, perseverance, and the humility required when facing health challenges that defy simple solutions. Will you join me on this journey of discovery and healing?
Intro for podcast
Here is the link for Sunday's 4 pm Pacific time Zoom meeting
Well, hello and welcome to the Healthy Living Podcast. I'm your host, joe Grumbine, and this is another subscriber episode, and I'm really pleased that this last couple of weeks we've been increasing our subscriber the amount of people subscribing, and I'm super grateful for that. I just want everybody who's listening to know that, whether you hear all these episodes or not, your support really helps and it makes it so that I can get these messages out, maybe reach more people. I know, as more people are hearing these episodes, I'm getting feedback that people are looking into their own truths and they're finding inspiration to stand up against things that many people might not, and that's a big part of this, and maybe as important or more important, we're building a community of people who have shared the same values and find the same things important, and I think community is one of the most important elements of health. I think as people find themselves isolated, it becomes harder and harder to be healthy, and as you have a community of loved ones, I believe it's easier and easier. So let's make it easy.
Speaker 1:I want to welcome Keith, who's the recent subscriber, and Keith, we got to hang out a little bit yesterday. It was good to see you again and, you know, I am hoping that some of the things we talked about help you as much as they're helping me. We're going to do a pretty brief update, but just remember the subscription side of this. I am sharing the day-to-day progress of my cancer journey, as I've already gone through enough of it for the public, and this is all the day-to-day stuff. So if you're really interested in supporting and following the subscriptions, the only way you're going to get that and I'm still getting bombarded from people sending me the same old stuff and you know, here's the answer All you got to do is this the truth about this and the truth about that. And, as I've said so many times before, there are truths in these things, but you got to dig through and you got to find them and you got to determine the truth that applies to you. And again, I encourage you to read or listen to the Structure of Scientific Revolution by Thomas Kuhn and it'll change the way you think about things.
Speaker 1:We make assumptions, we believe things, we're told things, we accept information from sources. We don't consider relevance or motivation and we're wrong so much of the time about so many things and we go around thinking we're right and we go around making opinions because we think we're right and I just it's sad and I'm here to bring truth. I'm not saying do what I do. I'm saying just listen to what I'm telling you and see how might it apply to you. Maybe it does or maybe it doesn't, maybe it applies to somebody you know.
Speaker 1:So I'm in the middle of a little bit of a crisis here and again. I'm certain I caused it myself in an effort to make something good happen. Sometimes we find that we go too far or, you know, we have unintended consequences and, as I've mentioned back in previous episodes, I aggravated the tumor and caused it to breach and I've been dealing with a little bit of bleeding and weeping for the last several days and finally I get approved and the day before yesterday the insurance approved my port install and subsequent chemotherapy and we got the appointment and I'm on point. I had my last meal on Monday afternoon, so I'll be in a good, fasted state and we go down, I get my blood work done and and the whole time I'm still in the back of my mind going God, I hope this doesn't cause a problem. And still, this thing's weeping a little bit, but I'm like if somebody sees that they're going to know, they're going to you know why wouldn't they flag it and tell me and no, everything seems to be good, we're going forward.
Speaker 1:I get my blood work. That was quick. We go and got to sit out in the sun for maybe a good half an hour waiting to go into the surgery. And then I go in and everybody's just very pleasant and they go through and they're explaining everything to me and making sure I understand what's happening. More than once they ask me now do you understand what you're doing here? I said, yeah, I'm getting a port placement so that I can receive chemotherapy for this squamous cell carcinoma that I'm in the process of beating, beating. And, um, they tell me I thought I was going to get a general anesthetic, but it was going to be some kind of an iv drip where they have a combination of some pain stuff and anti-anxiety stuff, stuff that I really don't want in my body, but at the same time, um, I'm just not fighting anybody right now, we're just going through and let God handle this, and I'm confident that what I need to get is what I'm going to get.
Speaker 1:And so I'm sitting there, my wife is sitting there next to me and they, you know, give me my gown and my socks and head you know head covering and and they slip an IV into my hand, or at least the the tube for it. And, um, I'm sitting there and when my wife takes off she's going to go get something to eat because she can't be in there. When, when they're doing their operating, they show me the port, they tell me how it's going to go and they're going to it's going to be put in kind of near my heart and, um, basically this, it gets installed right there in the vein and then it comes up to this little like a bladder that sits right underneath the skin and then, when they need to put the chemo in, they just kind of pinch the thing and it just goes right into the bladder because apparently this cocktail is very toxic to the veins and it'll burn them out and you can have all kinds of problems, which, again, one more thing to worry about. So here we are, we're sitting there they shaved me we're just talking, they're explaining the anesthesia and everything, and then all of a sudden somebody comes in and says we just got your blood work back and You've got an elevated white blood cell count. We're gonna have to call this and I was just like what.
Speaker 1:And I was just like what and I'm just sitting here going okay, well, that's what I had hoped wouldn't happen, but it did and I showed them. I mean, I says, you know, this thing, I keep pumping it and you know, is there something that they can do? Can they give me some antibiotics or something? I mean, I know I haven't had any antibiotics in years, so my suspicion would be that it would probably be pretty effective if I was to take some. But nobody said anything and I went to the or no, so then they sent me home.
Speaker 1:So, you know, I let my team know, my closest support team that's really been with me through this whole thing, the ones that's raising the money that actually paid for all this um, and you know, of course, everybody's super supportive and Florina Threehawk kind of you know, kept me from being too hard on myself. Because my first thought was you know, you did this to yourself and I was like, yeah, but I didn't mean to. You know, I didn't. I wasn't trying to hurt myself, I was trying to heal myself and sometimes you get things wrong. You know that's part of being a pioneer is you learn, you pivot, you make a mistake, you pick yourself up and you keep going, and that's what I'm doing and uh, and I'm continuing to oxygenate and doing all these things that I'm supposed to do, and I set something in motion that I couldn't control. And that's the thing with the human body. You know, as we're biohacking and trying to make changes, sometimes you set something in motion that's hard to undo. These reactions and these systems are very delicate and you know, these are we don't understand them nearly as much as we think we do in so many ways. And at the end of the day, you know, we observe things and we make assumptions and we believe things, but we don't always know. In fact, probably most of the time we don't know.
Speaker 1:And so I get home and I get a call from UCI and I'm thinking, okay, well, they know what's going on. And this is Bonnie. She's been super, super helpful, really trying to help me get this thing moved forward. And she says, well, we have you scheduled for your port install tomorrow. And I says, well, wait a minute, somebody there's a, there's a mix-up. And I says, well, wait a minute, somebody there's a, there's a mix-up. And I said look, I just was sitting in surgery prep and they aborted this thing because of elevated white blood cell count. And she's talking about going to get lab work and and I don't know. There's just some miscommunication. And I, I said, listen, I went in, I had the blood work and they said, right on the surgery prep table, they said my white blood cell was elevated and they wouldn't do it because they're afraid of infection. She goes well. You have cancer, though, and a lot of times there's elevated white blood cell count. I says, I know, but I've got this breach to the tumor and it's been weeping a little bit. I explained everything to her and I think she, she seemed to understand. So she's talking to the oncologist and they're trying to come up with some kind of an answer.
Speaker 1:And I, they know my frustration with this. They know this thing is, you know, getting encroaching again. I, I, you know I may not be able to do this podcast for very long if I can't talk, and it's getting harder and harder to talk, it's harder and harder to do anything, and you know, I'm hoping it doesn't continue, I'm hoping it reverses. Every second I pray for this miracle that just all said. Now it starts, but day by day. You know I stay steadfast. I hope I continue my journey of faith. I just know that. You know I didn't get put in this spot to fail, but meanwhile it doesn't make it easier and it doesn't make it more challenging, it just means I just have to stay the course. And so I didn't get any real resolution. I'm waiting to hear from them.
Speaker 1:And I finally ended up going outside and pushing some sand up the hill. That's been my therapy, and I know that some vigorous exercise can help increase blood flow and and and cause healing to happen. So I did some sand therapy for a while and then I went in, did my infrared sauna and ate, broke my fast and I slept pretty okay last night. Not great, but you know it's just the restrictiveness. I can barely move my neck right now and that's one of the hardest things right now.
Speaker 1:And I woke up this morning and it's still weeping a little bit. But the redness is gone, some. It seems like it's a little better than it was and it seems that the fluid is getting more clear again, instead of being kind of pussy. Luckily it's not. It doesn't smell. I guess that's a tell. If an infection is really bad, it'll start to stink, and this doesn't seem to stink. So, anyways, pray for me and help any way you can. I appreciate it. I am here to bring what I've learned to the world and inspire and teach as I can, but I got to be here to do it. So thank you for all your support, everybody that is here, and I genuinely cherish all of the true support I've been getting. We'll see you next time.
